The Small Business Blog has a curiously paranoid list of 20 things they hate about the Internet. Unfortunately I can’t link to it because they don’t seem to have permalinks for individual items…

Here’s their list:

20 Things I Hate About the Internet

1. I really hate the fact that individuals can say whatever they want, regardless of whether it is true, there is no recourse for libel or slander because in many cases the posts are not in the same country as the person slandered.

Just how paranoid do you have to be for this to be your number one hate about the Internet? Let’s find out…

2. I hate that the truth is becoming collective, or from those the most persistent. The popularity of wiki’s and in particular wikipedia means that history is becoming fluid.

History has always been fluid, subjective. Princes in the Tower anyone? Oooh, look, here’s Wikipedia trying to deliver a balanced overview of the various prevailing theories about whodunnit. I’m pretty sure that’s a more appropriately skeptical treatment of the subject than I remember from school text books.

3. I hate that it is almost impossible to discern an online writer’s credibility.

You mean unless you engage your critical faculties? You know, read some other stuff they’ve written, make a judgement? Online you can quickly find just about everything someone’s written and feed the whole lot into your bullshit filter.

4. I hate that crime is allowed to flourish online.

As opposed to the real world where crime has been completely eliminated?

5. I hate that the EU forces US companies to collect VAT on European sales. US companies don’t benefit from the tax, yet they are forced to staff individuals to handle collection and submission of VAT taxes to European Governments.

Sucks. Has precisely what to do with the Internet? The same rules would apply to conventional mail order. Isn’t the fact that the Internet opens this market to you at all a good thing?

6. I hate that U.S. legislatures passed a law that it is illegal for US citizens to remain anonymous on line yet pedophiles hide behind anonymity.

Is that true? I can’t find any reference to a U.S. law that makes online anonymity illegal. Obviously people doing bad things will attempt to conceal their identity; that’s hardly a bad thing about the Internet.

7. I hate that email is so impersonal and so easily misunderstood.

Check. Sometimes you just have to talk to people.

8. I hate that personal information on nearly any person is simply only a click away.

Not strictly a single click. In practice you need an eleven year old hacker from the movies who can crack the strongest known crypto with ten minutes of frantic typing. Or are you just talking about whatever you choose to reveal about yourself? Isn’t that, you know, your responsibility?

9. I hate that children see Internet pornography without even trying.

Well as you later point out they are much more adept at using the ‘net. Still, jealously is an ugly thing - I think you should let it go. If you practice really hard you’ll be able to find pr0n without trying too.

10. I hate that law abiding citizens are at a distinct disadvantage on the Internet.

No, sorry. You’ve completely lost me now.

11. I hate if you work at an Internet business your day does not end at 5:00.

I like the fact that I work pretty much whenever I want to - unlike friends who work in conventional businesses. Still, YMMV.

12. I hate to be at Google’s mercy for search engine ranking.

I’m glad Google goes to such lengths to stop you gaming your search engine rank.

13. I hate that search engines are constantly changing their algorythms.

I’m glad Google goes to such lengths to stop you gaming your search engine rank.

14. I hate that children know more about the Internet than their parents.

Yeah, it’s terrible to see kids embracing a new technology with their hungry little minds. They’ll probably live longer than us too. Bastards.

15. I hate that the Internet archives can store. Comments that may or may not be true for what could be an eternity.

And even if your grammar gets better they remember the time when you used to randomly. Start new sentences for no apparent reason.

16. I hate that the Internet is litered with junk sites and abandoned out of date content.

As a specific example a recent survey has shown that if all the redundant top 20 lists were properly recycled we’d free up enough numbers to count to nearly 1,000,000.

17. I hate that Internet obsession allienates the older generation.

I must ask my 75 year old parents about that the next time I can drag them away from emailing bridge scores to each other.

18. I hate that Google so much power.

Grrr! Still smarting over that crappy pagerank eh?

19. I hate that the playing field for small businesses on the Internet is no longer level.

Yes, it’s really irksome that crap companies can’t stand shoulder to shoulder with great ones any more.

20. I hate that clickfraud is a part of life if marketing on the Internet.

Undoubtedly clickfraud is one of the major threats to society as we know it. I couldn’t agree more on this one.

This entry was posted on Wednesday, December 13th, 2006 at 2:44 pm and is filed under Culture. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.